John Willie's ferret
John Howarth vocal; Gerry Kearns chorus & guitar; Larry Kearns chorus
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
1.Well he slipped his lead with some butter from the sauce
He patterned all the table with his dirty little paws,
Ooh said the vicars wife this rabbit isn’t dead,
As he danced a little jig around the hat upon her head.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
He ran down her collar and down the front he tore,He wriggled down her knicker leg, and danced across the floor
“Hey up” said the vicar “ that’s a sewer rat I’m sure”,
“Well if that’s the case "his wife replied “I wish we had some more”.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
Then he ran through the soup and he nibbled at the peas,
He dribbled all the gravy down the mayor’s knocking knees,
And then he quenched his ferret’s thirst with half a pint of shandy,
And then relieved his little self, in Mrs Brialey’s Brandy.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
Well the ladies left their tables, and began to dance with fright
They shouted out in panic at the little ferret’s sight
He nibbled at their stockings and he tickled all their knees,
And the vicar’s wife kept shouting “give me some of that please”.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
He ran up and down the curtains and he swam about the punch
He herded all the ladies in a corner in a bunch,
And just to end the escapade he did a little quickie,
He ran up the speaker’s dinner suit and nibbled at his collar.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
So they caught the little fellow, and they put him in a box,
They gave him anaesthetic from the vicar’s woolly socks.
The sang him Annie Laurie in the mayor’s own car and then,
They got him back to John Willie’s pen.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
Larry Kearns
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
1.Well he slipped his lead with some butter from the sauce
He patterned all the table with his dirty little paws,
Ooh said the vicars wife this rabbit isn’t dead,
As he danced a little jig around the hat upon her head.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
He ran down her collar and down the front he tore,He wriggled down her knicker leg, and danced across the floor
“Hey up” said the vicar “ that’s a sewer rat I’m sure”,
“Well if that’s the case "his wife replied “I wish we had some more”.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
Then he ran through the soup and he nibbled at the peas,
He dribbled all the gravy down the mayor’s knocking knees,
And then he quenched his ferret’s thirst with half a pint of shandy,
And then relieved his little self, in Mrs Brialey’s Brandy.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
Well the ladies left their tables, and began to dance with fright
They shouted out in panic at the little ferret’s sight
He nibbled at their stockings and he tickled all their knees,
And the vicar’s wife kept shouting “give me some of that please”.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
He ran up and down the curtains and he swam about the punch
He herded all the ladies in a corner in a bunch,
And just to end the escapade he did a little quickie,
He ran up the speaker’s dinner suit and nibbled at his collar.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
So they caught the little fellow, and they put him in a box,
They gave him anaesthetic from the vicar’s woolly socks.
The sang him Annie Laurie in the mayor’s own car and then,
They got him back to John Willie’s pen.
Chorus
I was there so were you, the mayor and the vicar all the council too,
With their wives and ladies on full view, the night John Willie took his ferret to a do.
Larry Kearns
John Willie’s Ferret
Vocal John Howarth and Larry Kearns; Vocal and Guitar Gerry Kearns
Larry conceived the idea for this song after John, a deer-stalker friend of the trio, told how he used to take his ferrets to parties
and of the havoc they caused. It is a fun song, a bit of aural slapstick. Larry wrote the words. Gerry wrote half the tune but adapted the chorus from Sur le Pont d’ Avignon.
Vocal John Howarth and Larry Kearns; Vocal and Guitar Gerry Kearns
Larry conceived the idea for this song after John, a deer-stalker friend of the trio, told how he used to take his ferrets to parties
and of the havoc they caused. It is a fun song, a bit of aural slapstick. Larry wrote the words. Gerry wrote half the tune but adapted the chorus from Sur le Pont d’ Avignon.
First published by Topic 1977
Sit Thee Down LP 12TS323 STEREO
The Oldham Tinkers
Gerry Kearns vocal, guitar
Larry Kearns vocal, mandolin, whistle
John Howarth vocal, banjo, whistle
Recorded and produced by Tony Engle in London
Notes by Larry Kearns
Sleeve design by Tony Engle
Illustration by John Atkinson
Re-released on CD 1999
“A Fine Old English Gentleman” PIERCD 501
The Best of the Topic Years
Re-issued by Pier Records 1999
Released under licence from Topic Records
&
The Oldham Tinkers
Sit Thee Down PIERCD 505
Released under licence from Topic Records Ltd, England
(P) 1077 & 1968 (Tracks 15 – 18) Topic Records Ltd
© 2002 Pier Records
Pier Records is a Wooden Hill Recordings Ltd label.
Sit Thee Down LP 12TS323 STEREO
The Oldham Tinkers
Gerry Kearns vocal, guitar
Larry Kearns vocal, mandolin, whistle
John Howarth vocal, banjo, whistle
Recorded and produced by Tony Engle in London
Notes by Larry Kearns
Sleeve design by Tony Engle
Illustration by John Atkinson
Re-released on CD 1999
“A Fine Old English Gentleman” PIERCD 501
The Best of the Topic Years
Re-issued by Pier Records 1999
Released under licence from Topic Records
&
The Oldham Tinkers
Sit Thee Down PIERCD 505
Released under licence from Topic Records Ltd, England
(P) 1077 & 1968 (Tracks 15 – 18) Topic Records Ltd
© 2002 Pier Records
Pier Records is a Wooden Hill Recordings Ltd label.